I was a little snippy before I went to bed last night. I was just tired and hadn’t slept well the night before and had the suspicion that I wasn’t going to sleep well again and just wanted to get to bed and get on with it. I was snippy, Hubby didn’t seem to notice or care, and I told myself that today I would start again. Always start again. I went to bed, wasn’t tired, read, almost fell asleep, and then the power went out. I tried to get the electrical website up to report the outage and their page was down. I tried to call and my number wasn’t associated with an account. The power came back on 15 minutes after it went out and I went back to bed. I got up to pee TWICE before I dozed off and then Hubby came to bed and I got up and peed again because that’s just what I do now.
I woke up at 5 and told myself that it was going to be a good day and went back to sleep.
I woke up to Hubby’s alarm because I forgot to set mine after turning it off for the holiday. I slept in, not a lot but enough to make me feel a little rushed. The power going off messed up the drier, putting me behind on laundry. The cats were being jerks. The house was a mess. I was so keyed up that I couldn’t meditate. I kept catching myself thinking about how much I had to do and how I told Hubby that we could play games all week and how those things don’t GO TOGETHER. I tripped over a box. Most of me wearable clothes were wet. I was wigging out.
But I kept stopping myself and taking deep breaths and trying to get a grip on my stress.
Sometimes, that’s all that you can do.
I’m at work and I am happy to be here. There are a lot of things that I want to work on this week while it’s slow and I’m alone in my department. It won’t be a bad week at all. Four work days and then a five day break, which I really need. I don’t have to do it all. I can relax and take my time, knowing that that time is coming. But I DO wish that I could be home today, that I could be putting things in order and taking a nap and snuggling some cats. And that’s okay. In the meantime, I’m here and if I focus on the work at hand the day will fly by and I’ll be home in no time.
I hope your holidays were merry and bright.