Flow

Flow:  In positive psychology, flow, also known as the zone, is the mental state of operation in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and enjoyment in the process of the activity. In essence, flow is characterized by complete absorption in what one does.  (wikipedia)

Flow.  Today is my late day again and I tried to do something different this morning.  I tried to go with the flow, to find some flow, to concentrate on one thing at a time, to be mindful in my thoughts and actions.  It was nice and the morning went by quickly, too quickly. I didn’t get enough done.  But I want to keep doing it.  I want to live my life peacefully, mindfully, at ease.

Last night I stopped at the bank on the way home from work to cash a check.  I got trapped in the slowest line and couldn’t change lines because of the other cars.  I grew more and more frustrated.  I watched people come, do their banking, and leave.  Numerous people.  I just wanted to go home.  I just wanted to get there before Hubby and take care of a couple more things.  I wanted to finish cleaning the house.  I was there for over fifteen minutes and by the time I left I was in a mood.  I was cranky and stressed and felt like a big baby.  When I got home, I stormed upstairs and started bitching to Hubby right away.

He told me I stress him out.  He made me stop and sit down and relax.

And I did.  I sat down on the couch.  I put on my show.  I tossed some frozen food in the oven.  I didn’t work on anything.  I just watched TV.  At 9, Hubby went to bed and I went soon after.  We laid in the dark and watched Jeopardy on his phone, guessing the answers until I fell asleep.  And I slept better than I had in days.

So, I guess what I’m saying is that I need to calm down.  There are no real fires to put out.  Everything can wait.  It’ll get done when it gets done.