I took a break.
Friday night I had a couple of drinks and hung out with Hubby.
Saturday night Bestie and her husband came over and I got drunk and spent the night talking and listening to music and hanging out.
Sunday I turned off my to do list. I ate grinders for breakfast. My brother-in-law and his friend came over for games and Hubby’s carnitas. I drank a big pitcher of tea and let myself just relax without worrying about all of the things I “needed” to do.
Monday I went shopping with my mom. I bought hand soap and a dress and a top. I had ice cream and pizza. I came home tired, aware that I had pushed myself too hard, and took a nap. I turned off my to do list at 7 and had a couple of beers.
And all of this time I continued to be a mother. I took care of LM. I pumped and dumped. I pumped and fed. I had the amazing experience of being relaxed enough that my milk supply nearly doubled. I snuggled him and talked to him and played with him and let other people do those things too.
And now I feel like a human again and I want to encourage myself to continue to let things go and relax and love my life. Because there is so much to love.